IQ Tests Will Be Required For Future Presidential Nominees
Now that the national nightmare of the Trump White House occupation is almost over, a new Supreme Court decision has been quietly signed into law. In the future, all presidential nominees will be required to take an IQ test as part of their physical…Liam Neeson 'Taken 4' Performance "Exceptional"
Fans of the 'Taken' movies will be interested to learn that the fourth film in the series, 'Taken 4: A Ride' will be released into cinemas a week on Monday, 9 November, or 9/11. Liam Neeson once again plays Bryan Mills, the former CIA operative wh…Trump Does Not Want To Win Reelection
Donald Trump does not want to win reelection. He’s done everything to abuse the office, alienate supporters, create chaos with the Constitution, confuse our allies, scientists, even calling doctors thieves. Still, the crowds keep showing up and cheer…Man Killed Rat Before Going To Bed, Then Had Nightmare
Unusual experiences leading up to bedtime can have strange effects on our mibds once we have eventually got to sleep, and this was true for one man last night, after he spotted a rat in his house, and bashed its brains out with a sweeping brush. M…Report Shows US Economy Boosted by Arson and Violence
WASHINGTON DC - Democrats continue to claim credit for any and all positive economic news. Career bureaucrats at various agencies in the US Capitol determined that President Trump's opposition to ANTIFA will hurt economic recovery. As US GDP accelera…Warren Puffitt Predicts: Trump Could Still Win: A Stimulus, the "Bradley Effec
Omaha, Nebraska, An S.O.B. report for Spoof On Business. That other Omaha financial wizard, Warren Puffitt, reminds pollsters around the country that Donald Trump could still pull out a victory because of two things. 1- the likelihood that Trum…Paris reveals abuse suffered in earlier years
Social butterfly and Hollywood celebrity Paris Hilton has talked recently about the abuse she suffered in her younger years. In a recent TV interview, Ms Hilton spoke about the effect that abuse had on her. She said that one encounter with a nativ…Michael Gove missing being the tea boy
Michael Gove, chief Government house-elf, has admitted that, during the lockdown, he has really missed being tea-boy. 'I miss making the tea and coffee for Boris, and for Rishi Sunak. I never made it for anyone else, but when I asked Priti Patel i…UCLA Enters PAC-12 Conference Season Undefeated
Westwood Village, UCLA - An SOS from Woof Blister reporting for Spoof On Sports. Unlike the 2018 and 2019 football seasons, when UCLA ended their pre-season games 0-3, the Bruins will enter the PAC-12 conference schedule UNDEFEATED. That's because t…President Trump is Mad at The World Because He Knows Melania Is Getting Ready to Divorce Him
MIAMI â€" (Satire News) â€" President Trump somehow found the time to play golf at his own Trump Doral Golf Course. CNN reports that he rode around in a golf cart that the American taxpayers paid for, while millions of Americans are unemployed, and wi…Unwashed coffee cups Mavis and Florence are still on furlough, having not left the side of the sink since their office shut down in March. 'Every day, I watch the mould grow increasingly thick and dark,' wailed Mavis, in her surprisingly deep, son…
B. O. Plenty Endorses Sleepy Joe Biden
BILLINGSGATE POST: B. O. Plenty, the husband of Gravel Gertie and father of Sparkle Plenty, today announced his support for Sleepy Joe Biden. Sparkle was a child prodigy at the age of two. Already talking and doing chores at her home in Fontana, s…NEW YORK CITY â€" CNN host Don “Rainbow†Lemon recently told fellow host Chris Cuomo that he has never known a man who hates women more than President Trump does. He pointed out that POTUS hates Senator Elizabeth Warren, Michigan Governor Gretchen W…
The Atlanta Falcons Have The Ugliest Football Playing Field in The Entire NFL
ATLANTA â€" (Sports Satire) â€" Sports Territory Magazine recently took a poll, and asked readers to choose their 'ugliest football stadium in the NFL'. STM writer Hiawatha Pamplona said that the overwhelming winner was Mercedes-Benz Stadium, home to…The World Is Flat And Doctors Are Liars Says, Donald Trump
In his last-ditch attempt to win reelection, and kick COVID-19 into the history books, Donald Trump claims that COVID-19 is gone, over with, no longer an issue. With 9,000 dying 3 days before election day, Trump may as well say that the world is f…Prince Louis Seen Without Face Mask
Prince Louis, the youngest son of Prince William, the Duke of Cambridge, and his wife, Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge, has come in for some rather severe criticism tonight, after he was seen in public not wearing any kind of face protection.New day-in-the-life-of-a-sheep analytical study emerges with fast delivery from Amazon
Breaking: For the first time in Earth's history, a new type of author has been found, proudly announced through Amazon dot com and Mr. Bezos. That is, a sheep as scribeâ€"yes, from the animal of the species ovis balantes dispersusâ€"has emerged with a…Skeleton glad to be staying indoors
Skeleton Gary Jones is glad that, this year, he can stay in. 'No-one seems to be doing anything for Halloween this year, so I don't think I will,' said the strangely cheerful, bloodless, skinless and internal organ-less married father-of-three.Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Hapy Birthday! Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you! There were scenes of joy at the White House today, as President Trump's favorite daughter, Ivanka, celebrated her birthday in style, with a huge…
Spider's Web survives third week in the corner
Spider's web Gavin Williamson is smug, having survived his third week in the corner of your bedroom. The long piece of webbing, that began his life in the rear end of a spider, has smugly been hanging around in the corner because, as always, you d…Photocopiers breathing a sigh of relief
Photocopiers across the country are breathing a sigh of relief, as all office Christmas parties have been banned, due to Covid 19. Gestetner 39ZX Donna said: 'Yes, thank God that Kevin and Amanda won't be photocopying their backsides this year. Am…WASHINGTON, D.C. â€" (Satire News) â€" One of the Secret Service agents assigned to protect 14-year-old Barron Trump has said that he is very concerned with the President’s mental state. The unnamed agent commented that Trump is doing some really stra…
Trump v. Biden Big Fight Preview
As the Big Fight countdown counts down and the 'Scrap of the Old Guys' on 3 November gets ever nearer, a sober analysis of the two contenders shows that Democrat Joe Biden might be found wanting in his bid to gain the edge over President Trump in thi…Trump Using Fake/Misleading Video About Biden
Donald Trump is using a faked, misleading video to ridicule opponent Joe Biden. Trump hasn't looked in the mirror lately. Fake and misleading is the tan makeup and Elvis red hair comb-over. Wearing the overcoat on a hot day is trying to fake and misl…A Hacker Hacks Into President Trump’s Campaign Website And Reveals Very Revealing Secrets
LAS VEGAS â€" (Satire News) â€" Political Salad Bar Magazine has stated that a computer hacker has hacked into President Trump’s campaign website. A private computing anti-hacking company told PSBM that the hacker is extremely professional, and was ab…Two Million U.S. Presidential Election Ballots Are Discovered in a Dumpster in Mexico
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) â€" Ipso Facto Illustrated Magazine is reporting that 2 million U.S. voting ballots were confiscated in Mexico by a task force comprising members with the FBI, CIA, IRS, and IUD. The ballots were transported on an Ae…Top 10 Reasons to Reelect President Trump
Here are the top 10 reasons for patriotic Americans to reelect President Donald J. Trump. But don’t worry if you can’t make it to the polls on election day. It might not matter at the end of that day. If, by some unimaginable fluke, President T…The USA has completely disappeared. Canada and Mexico awoke today to find no land connecting them. Our correspondent in Tijuana, Sam Brero, says there were reports around the time of the US presidential election of one of the candidates dressed as a…
Adam Schiff refuses wrestling match with Bobulinski in Madison Square Gardens
Former business associate of Hunter Biden, Mr. Tony Bobulinski, yesterday invited Representative Schiff to a showdown and “manly resolutionâ€. “In the old days, there was the duel,†Mr. Bobulinski (earlier an expert wrestler) said. “Today? Well, h…Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones is Considering Signing Tim Tebow To Be His Starting Quarterback
DALLAS â€" (Satire Sports) â€" Jerry Jones is in a world of hurt, as they say out yonder in the Lone Star state. The Cowboys owner is down to having to use his third-string quarterback, Ben DiNucci, after Dak Prescott and Andy Dalton have both been i…