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Trump Attending Inauguration But Will Carry A Cross

Failing in all fifty states of the United States to overturn the election, sore loser Donald Trump, still not conceding, will attend the inauguration, but insists on carrying a six-foot-long cross on one shoulder. Sons Donald Jr. and Eric will follow…

Barack Obama Discovers Fat Man In Filthy Robe In His Kitchen

It's a well-known fact that celebrity always has its negative side, usually in the form of 'privacy issues, and that was the case this week with ex-President Barack Obama, who came downstairs to prepare breakfast on Saturday morning to find an intrud…

German local newspaper "WochenSpiegel' goes viral with sensational headlines and, no fake news!!

(NOT EDITED) A local German weekly newspaper, read by 300 people, at the most, has stormed the internet with the following headlines! People sick to death of Corona, HIM stuck in the White House, ISIS, global poverty, global warming, global misery…

Harry Maguire Revealed To Be Mere Figment Of Spoof Writer's Imagination

After all the many controversies concerning the Manchester United and England defender 'Harry Maguire' over the last two years, it's been revealed that the hard-as-nails Brick Shithouse is merely a fictional character created by the overactive imagin…

Man Was So Tired, He Dreamt He Was Falling Asleep

A man was so physically and mentally exhausted after he finished his morning shift today, that he fell into a deep slumber, and, as he slept, he dreamt a dream in which he was so tired, that he just couldn't keep himself from falling asleep. Moys…

Ross Kemp Stripped Of Bonny Baby Title After 54 Years…

Ex-SAS Man-turned-actor, Ross Kemp, has been stripped of the title that was pinned with honour on the CV that eventually won him his first role in EASTENDERS. The shamed actor with the petted lip is said to be devastated at the news. It's not t…

Donald Trump Jr. Has The Trumpapalooza Virus â€" And Guess Who He’s Blaming?

WASHINGTON, D.C. â€" (Satire News) â€" RumorLand News has put out that with Donnie Jr. now infected with his dad’s COVID-19 virus, he now makes the number of White House residents, staffers, and ass-kissers who have contacted the dreaded disease at 83,…

Toilet Paper Panic Buying Wipes Out The Grocery Store Isles (Again)

LOS ANGELES â€" (Satire News) â€" Well, it looks like the panic rush on toilet paper has hit the nation once again. The Vox Populi News Agency is reporting that thousands of supermarkets throughout the land of the red, white, and do, have sold out of…

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry Buy Taylor Swift’s 3,000 Acre Texas Ranch

SAN ANTONIO â€" (Satire News) â€" The Ipso Facto News Agency has announced that Prince Harry and his wife Meghan Markle have reached an agreement to purchase Taylor Swift’s Blue Tattoo Ranch. The working cattle ranch is located just south of San Anton…

Where To Hang Trump’s White House Portrait?

Though President Trump is being uncooperative and failing to concede, the White House Historical Society will have to commission a portrait of him. While he will not have to pose, the question has been raised: Where to hang the Donald Trump portrait…

The Houston Astros and The Boston Red Sox Are Thinking About Trading Center Fielders â€" George Springer for Jackie Bradley Jr.

HOUSTON â€" (Sports Satire) â€" It’s no secret that the honeymoon between the Houston Astros and George Springer is over. In fact, the Astros are asking for some of the wedding gifts to be returned. The Astros priority is to get something or someone f…

Northern City Still Out In Front In Race To Oblivion

As the second spike of the Coronavirus really gets into its stride, with infection rates rising all over mainland Britain, the city of Hull, in East Yorkshire, has emerged as the runaway leader in the Race to Oblivion, the virus infection 'league' sp…

Obama's New Book: George Clooney And Lindsey Lohan Sharing The Lincoln Bedroom With Harry Maguire

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a gossipy chapter of Barack Obama’s new book, The Promised Land, Obama recalls that George Clooney was without a date for the White House Correspondent's Dinner because Stacy Keibler had stiffed him at the last minute. The…

Coming Soon To A Toilet Near You -- Fresh Air!

We've all been there: "Whew! Do NOT go in there! YEOW!" "Oh, my God! Did you do this?! Did you do THIS?!" "That wasn't me!" And the classic: "I don't remember eating that!" I am referring to the humanity-sharing experience of vi…

Spoof Writer In World Record Attempt To Write The Longest Headline That Has Ever Been Seen On The Site, But Urges Readers Not To Read The Story Because There Is Nothing New In It That The Headline Hasn't Already Informed Them About!

A writer on a satirical news and parody website has published a story which, he hopes, will break the world record for the length of headline it contains, it being a humongously-long 42 words! The writer concerned has tried to ensure, however, tha…

Federal Judge Dismisses Trump Campaign Pennsylvania Lawsuit

Federal judges are passing rubber stamps to one another, dismissing Trump lawsuits. Trump’s lawsuits are running up in numbers around the country but to no avail. Trump lost the election. Old news. Apparently, Trump and his family don’t understand tw…

Supreme Court Will Order Re-run of Presidential Election

Washington, D. C. Exclusive to The Spoof. Having lost 35 of 35 cases alleging fraud in the presidential election, President Donald Trump's personal attorney, Rudy Giuliani, today filed with the Supreme Court a petition calling for a re-run of the pr…

Pig squeals in news room; offers lipstick for vote tallies

Indications of voter fraud in the recent presidential election are mounting, including an unusual feud on the right between Tucker Carlson and Trump lawyer, Sidney Powell. Tucker is not happy that Ms. Powell would not appear on his show with “evid…

Jaggedone's daily, non-tabloid, CIA, fake news! Nothing escapes his global roach reporters!

(NOT EDITED) Here we go! Jaggedone's: Daily CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) Tabloid Fake News, Not! MEXICAN BEER PRODUCER HAPPY FOR LATEST WHITE HOUSE PUBLICITY STUNT! Corona Beer global sales have rocketed ever since a Junior Trump declar…

Party Announces New Regulations to Protect Free Speech

PARTY ANNOUNCES NEW REGULATIONS TO PROTECT FREE SPEECH --Common-sense reforms promote Truth, Unity, and Accountability ------------------ WASHINGTON, DC â€" The Party today announced that Richard Stengel has been appointed Team Lead for the Un…

Barack Obama Writes About His Mother-In-Law In His New Book

BILLINGSGATE POST: In his new book, A Promised Land, Barack Obama dedicates a whole chapter to his mother-in-law. He describes the relationship he had with Michelle’s mother: “Mrs. Robinson, my mother-in-law, lived her entire life in Chicago.

UCLA Starts Season 1-2* With An Asterisk

Autzen Stadium, Eugene, Oregon. S. O. S. report from Spoof On Sports. The UCLA Bruins beat themselves with four turnovers, Saturday afternoon, as they fell 38-35 to the highly-ranked Oregon Ducks, in a game the Westwooders could have won. But, havin…

The Miami Fire Department Says They Will No Longer Be Accepting Unwanted Alligators

MIAMI â€" (Satire News) â€" The Miami Fire Department says that they are discontinuing their “Bring Us Your Unwanted Alligators” program. Fire Chief Lancelot “Sparky” Singletree told the news media that, at first, they could deal with getting one or t…

Navy Seals Will Take Trump Out

Asked during an interview by Jimmy Kimmel whether Donald Trump could hide out somewhere in a White House cubbyhole, former President Barack Obama confidently replied, “Oh, the Navy Seals will take him out.” Take him out? Certainly, Obama didn’t me…

Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson Allegedly Sold 4,000 Counterfeit Duck Whistles To Elderly People in Florida

WEST MONROE, Louisiana â€" (Satire News) â€" The patriarch of the reality show “Duck Dynasty” is, as they say down in the bayous of Louisiana, in a world of hurt. Phil Robertson, who runs Duck Commander Duck Whistles, is alleged to have sold 4,000 duc…

Yobbo Put Feet On Table

Good manners are usually the result of good parenting, but, in one household last week, it was a case not of having been 'brought up', but rather 'dragged up' - and, seemingly, by the scruff of the neck. Oscar Scrote, who is only 9, looks cute eno…

Golden State Warriors’ Star Klay Thompson Out For The Entire Season Due To Flickabulina

OAKLAND â€" (Sports Satire) â€" The entire Golden State Warriors organization is devastated, as team doctors have just announced that superstar Klay Thompson will be out for the entire season. Team physician Dr. Murray Bellacappela told the sports med…

Writer Emulates Another Writer, And Writes Story With Extremely Long Headline That Almost Completely Fills The Yellow 'Popular Funny Stories' Box On Front Page Of Site, But Which, When Placed Under Scrutiny, Has Little Or No Substance To It At All

You know you've achieved success when others start to emulate your work, and that's exactly what happened on a satirical news website earlier today, when one contributor wrote a story with an extremely long headline, just as one of the site's other w…

Newsom rushed to brain trauma unit following confrontation with computer assistant

Directly following his recent embarrassment at being caught at a dinner for twelve with no masks, and no social distancing, California's Governor Newsom is again in trouble. Additionally, the Governor's claim of the restaurant's setting as “outdoo…

Rudy Giuliani's Hair Dye - The Truth

Whilst joining words together that had no right to exist in the same sentence, former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani's hair dye decided that it had had enough. 'Imagine my surprise,' said the dark liquid, 'when I ended up on Rudy Giuliani's hair. I…