COVID-19 Vaccinations Going Well, With Few Problems
The COVID-19 vaccination programme, which was given the green light to go ahead in the UK, despite its failure to meet normal 'checking protocols', is progressing well, according to the government, with few problems. Vaccinations were allowed to c…Father Christmas Outed As The Devil
In news that will have most people questioning why they were unable to see it all along, it's been alleged that Father Christmas, the benevolent old man who delivers millions of gifts to children all over the world every December 25, has an alter-ego…Trump, Graham and Paul: “Very Unfair that Democrats are Allowed to Vote in Electionsâ€
Washington - In separate speeches or tweets this week, many Republicans are bemoaning the fact that so many Democrats found it relatively easy to vote in the last election for president. After his attempts to have ballots thrown out in predominant…Trump Told By Angela Merkel: "It's Time To Go!"
Germany's leader, Angela Merkel, has informed the US president, Donald Trump, that she has had enough, the world is fed up, the game is over, "und, Mein Gott!" it's time for him to go. Or it will be in January. Trump was beaten hands-down, fair…People No Longer Ask If Trump Is Off His Rocker
People no longer ask whether Donald Trump could be off his rocker (and they don’t mean rocking-chair). With his grotesque attempt to reverse the people's will and the 2020 election, they now view Trump as three clicks removed from reality. Numero…Man glad that this year he won't have to watch Time-Team again with his parents
Charlie Braithwaite, 27, and studious argument-inciter on Twitter, has revealed a secret upside to Covid-19. 'The good news is that I don't have to sit through my dad's box set of Time Team on Boxing Day, as is usually the case. I won't be visitin…Jesus spotted in Sowerby Bridge, Yorkshire, UK, walking on water!
(NOT EDITED) Ramblers, barge owners, and drunkards, passing through and residing in a wonderful Yorkshire village called, Sowerby Bridge, have seen something not seen in the UK since St. George defeated a Dragon! A week before Christmas, local pe…Couple Find Giant Timepiece In Back Garden
The sight of a disturbed back garden is often the sign of unwanted nocturnal activity for many householders, but the strange discovery made by a couple in Bradford left them scratching their heads, after they found a giant timepiece in the middle of…A Man Mates With a Female Robot and Short Circuits It All to Hell
FUKUOKA, Japan â€" (Satire News) â€" The Saki News Agency is reporting that a mechanical scientist who works for Japan’s Sayonara Samurai Robot Corporation was involved in a freak accident. Wakatoshi Origami, 29, who has worked as a mechanical scienti…Ivanka Trump Has Been Forced Into Rehab
PISCATAWAY, New Jersey â€" (Satire News) â€" iRumors has stated that the President’s favorite child, Ivanka, has been forced into rehab. Ivanka's husband, the sissified, Jared Kushner, told iRumors that he had to forcibly carry the 6-foot-tall, middle…Facebook Reminding you of better times
Have you been on Facebook lately? Been through a relationship breakup? Lost a job you loved? Seen all of your dreams come to nothing? Yes, Facebook, the cruellest of all social networks (there are others, but Myspace and Friends Reunited really do…Bucket Of Chicken Feathers Found Outside House
There was a surprise in store for one man this morning, when he went outside his property to have a look around, and found that some unknown person had left a bucket on the ground containing a quantity of chicken feathers. The black plastic bucket…People are scratching their heads and asking: Is Donald Trump a Russian agent? He seems mighty friendly with Russia. Certainly, more cooperative with Russia than the Biden transition team. Sour grapes? Yes, but Russia is an adversary. Soon after t…
The BBC has given me the best Christmas ever, exclaims man, sarcastically
Gary Johnson, the father of Tom and husband of Lorraine, has sarcastically claimed that the BBC has given him the best Christmas present it ever could. 'Look at this shite,' said Gary, reading from the internet. 'Another six years of Mrs Brown's B…Christmas 2020 cancelled! Not because of Corona! Virgin Mary has gone AWOL!
(NOT EDITED) Lovers of a global annual feast called Christmas, sponsored by Coca Cola, are going 'bananas' as Christian leaders have decided to cancel the 'mega-bash' this year. Other religious fraternities do not give a 'hoot' about this massive…13,000 U.S. Psychiatrists All Agree That Trump Is Totally Bat Shit Crazy
CHICAGO â€" (Satire News) â€" American Spotlight Magazine is reporting that a poll was recently taken of 13,000 of the most respected and reputable psychiatrists in the nation. The results unequivocally showed what just about everyone in the country,…The Real Story Behind Space Force
It's been over a year since the orange-skinned President Trump touted the formation of something called 'Space Force', but there hasn't been much media coverage about it after the big annoucement, other than the flag cost American tax payers an estim…Cure For Chapped Lips Announced Today: Chicken Manure
BILLINGSGATE POST: Funky Home Meds, a wholly-owned subsidiary of The Funky Corporation, announced today that the FDA has approved their savory salve ointment that they claim will make chapped lips a thing of the past. Freida Funk, heir apparent t…Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani Reveal a Pubic Region Secret
TISHOMINGO, Oklahoma â€" (Satire News) â€" America’s number one country music couple, Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani, recently talked to Yippee-Ki-Yay’s, Voodoo Dupree on their ranch in Oklahoma. The couple, who both appear as judges on “The Voiceâ€, s…'Singa along 'a Don' - Trump's new Christmas album 'the greatest ever', he says
And now this. The outgoing President and his team have recorded a host of revamped Christmas melodies and smashed into the Billboard charts at No. 1. Together with Melania, Rudy G., Kayleigh Mac and the Ivanka Clan, Donald has created an unforget…The President Trump/Ann Coulter Feud Erupts
WASHINGTON, D.C. â€" (Satire News) â€" There is no one on the face of the earth who loves feuding with people more than Donald J. Trump. And old #45 has just ignited a lava-hot feud with his old political nemesis, Ann "Horse Face" Coulter. Left Coa…A man who should probably know better at his age, has revealed how, during a motorbike ride to his place of employment this morning, he took aim with a child's plastic 'gun', and fired a tiny stone from it at a cow's behind, scoring a direct hit.
Kansas Refuses To Ban The Words Vagina & Penis
TOPEKA, Kansas â€" (Satire News) â€" An evangelical group calling itself The Anti-Democratic Crusaders, has been trying for the past four years to get the words vagina and penis, banned from public places in Iowa, such as nail salons, strip lounges, mass…McDonalds Announces That Their Brand New McWow Burger Has 3 Amazing Ingredients
CHICAGO - (Business Satire) â€" The McDonalds Corporation is proud to announce their latest addition to their food menu. Sonora Cahoots, a reporter with BuzzFuzz, said she talked to the franchise’s head of new food menu items director, Suzi Tottytil…The Party’s Over, Time For Trump To Go Home
Like a bad guest, Donald Trump is lingering on after the party is over and insisting it isn’t over, going to courts to try and keep the party going while demanding more food and drink. Some stragglers in the House and Senate want the gig and good tim…The San Antonio Spurs Want Kawhi Leonard Back Real Bad
SAN ANTONIO â€" (Sports Satire) â€" Word coming out of the Alamo City is that the San Antonio Spurs ownership has made it a top priority to do whatever they have to, to get super star NBA player Kawhi Leonard back. Leonard, who Michael Jordan and LeBr…Jennifer Lopez Apologizes For The Nude Photos
RENO, Nevada â€" (Satire News) â€" Jennifer Lopez, has just apologized to all of her fans, her family, her ex-husbands, and to her Bronx priest, Father Paco. J.Lo told Kitty Segovia, with the iNews Agency, that an unscrupulous bisexual hairstylist ma…Man Used Mosquito Zapper To Good Effect
It's always good when a product which you'd thought unlikely to work well proves you wrong, and that was exactly what happened when one man used his Mosquito Zapper for the very first time tonight, slaughtering dozens of the creatures, and laughing a…Bangladeshi Woman Rescued After 17 Days Buried in Factory Rubble Told to “Get Back to Work!â€
Bangladeshi rescuers pulled a garment worker alive from the rubble of a factory building 17 days after its collapse, and immediately ordered her back to work. Referring to her time buried alive as “17 days unauthorized vacationâ€, the garment factory…The New NBA Season Kicked Off With Fireworks
NEW YORK CITY â€" (Sports Satire) â€" The Christmas NBA season kicked off with a fabulous fireworks display in each home team’s parking lot. The world champion Los Angeles Lakers, who have had more of their players on the front of Wheaties cereal box…