Will Melania Trump Attend The Biden Inauguration?
It is believed by most, with opinions that don't matter, that Donald Trump will be a 'no-show' at the Biden inauguration. However, there is speculation (and Vegas bets) that Melania Trump, a US citizen and, by then, the former First Lady, may toss he…A man who woke up one morning last week with a nasty rash on his stomach, his upper arms and upper legs - but not his testicles - has finally decided to do something about it, after four days of constant itching and scratching himself into a frenzy.
Manchester United Captain Harry Maguire To Write Book About Greek Nightmare
It's what the newspapers have all been waiting for, the scoop of the moment, as the Manchester United captain, Harry Maguire, has announced that he is to commence writing a book documenting his recent nightmare experience on the Greek holiday island…Philadelphia - Running out of options after federal and state courts tossed all of their complaints filed to invalidate the election results In Pennsylvania, Republican lawyers led by Trump personal attorney Rudy Giuliani held a hastily-called news c…
Deep State Voter Fraud Thwarted By Slim Everdingle And Dirty Trick Detwiler
BILLINGSGATE POST: Rack up the balls, boys. Put away the cues. The Trumpster is on his way, and he ain’t gonna lose. Warning, Trump-haters. This could be just another giant rat f*ck: Using undercover methods first developed by Slim and Dirty…TISHOMINGO, Oklahoma â€" (Satire News) â€" The two country lovebirds are so looking forward to their upcoming 2021 Country Valentine’s Music Tour. Blake and Gwen announced to Boom Boom News that they have booked the Trumpapalooza Ass Kickin’ Band to b…
Surprise, Surprise, Donald Trump Didn’t Win
Donald Trump planned that his hand-picked Supreme Court would throw out all the mail-in ballots. But guess what happened? Mail-in ballots were not thrown out; they were received, counted, and accurately gave the majority votes to the Biden-Harris…It's Finally Official: 306 to 232
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - After what seemed like weeks, the final Electoral College numbers are in, and Joe Biden will be moving into 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in January. The final Electoral College vote tally was 306 to 232; a virtual la…Mass anti-lockdown protests in London by women with 'barge-arses', and men with huge 'beer guts!!'
The lockdown is something that is, obviously, not a good thing for many people, but it is a necessary evil, if we are to eradicate COVID-19. However, on the path to vaccines, there are many mountains to climb, especially with women developing 'barge-…Josh Reaume Has Been Suspended by NASCAR For An Extremely Unusual Reason
VENUS FLYTRAP, North Carolina â€" (Sports Satire) â€" Two weeks ago NASCAR driver Smokey “Bubba†Butterhouse was suspended from racing in the Crackerhead Saltine Crackers 200 Auto Race in Georgia. Butterhouse refused to paint over the likeness of Pres…People Disgusted With Woman Who Put Bananas On Her Head
A woman who put a large quantity of bananas on her head and started to walk around the streets with them, has come in for criticism from other members of the public, who said that her behavior was "unnecessary" and "unbecoming". The incident happe…Katy Perry Says She’s a Big Fan of New Female Rap Sensation Sista Frizzle Frazzle
HOLLYWOOD â€" (Satire News) â€" Pop singer Katy Perry told Hollywood Hors D'oeuvres that she is enjoying being a mama to Daisy Dove Bloom, who is only two months old, and can already play four chords on the ukulele. Daisy Dove’s daddy, actor Orlando B…Speaking Clock To Make Welcome Return
News has just reached us that, according to official timekeepers at the office of the Department of Time, in Greenwich, London, the Speaking Clock will make its much-awaited return to service in January. And the time is just gone twenty to five.DeBlasio daughter rushed to therapy following episode of tongue disorder
Mayor of New York, Bill DeBlasio, reports his daughter is recovering nicely and will be released soon. His daughter, Chiara DeBlasio, 25, showed signs of a second indication of perfide rei publicae lingua (rogue political tongue) in Democratic Cir…Trump suddenly appears in public. Biden is not worried.
President of the United States, Donald J Trump, has made his first public appearance in five days, to attend the Memorial Day remembrance service. Observers say he looked relaxed and at ease, as he laid a wreath at the memorial plinth and then pl…Elvis Spotted At a Sex Toy Shop in Iowa
CORN HOLE, Iowa - (Satire News) â€" Boom Boom News is reporting that two different individuals have claimed that they saw 'the king', Elvis Presley, in a sexy toy shop in the small town of Corn Hole. The two individuals identified as cousins Mingy M…SAN ANTONIO â€" (Satire News) â€" Aviary professors at San Antonio’s Solid State College have pointed out that the egret is the laziest bird in the entire world. Dr. Galahad P. Pio stated that a group of aviary scientists have noted that the egrets ar…
LANCASTER, Pennsylvania â€" (Satire News) â€" ABC News and CNN have both recently reported that the pretzel business is booming. Sales of the salt-covered pastry have already surpassed the national sales of Fried Spinach, Emu-Meat Hot Dogs, and Enchil…
President Trump Hates Fox News and Vows To Destroy It With His Own News Network
QUAKER OATS, Pennsylvania â€" (Satire News) â€" The President held another of his post-election campaign rallies. This one was in the Keystone state town of Quaker Oats. The town, founded in 1616, is noted for growing the tastiest oats in the world. I…Aged Spoof Writer to Take Kamala's Senate Seat?
Covina, CA. Special to The Spoof. In a surprising move, California governor Gavin Newsom is considering appointing one of The Spoof's major contributors to replace Kamala Harris as that state's junior senator. This, despite press reports that a Latin…Kilts, sporrans and 'tossing' their cabers prove Scotland still have 'mega-ginger-balls!'
NOT EDITED No underwear needed as Scottish footy players flashed their 'necessaries' in Zagreb proving this great, tiny nation, is back among Europe's elite, with or without Brexit! The renowned Tartan Army, sporting ginger bonces, knocked-knees,…Fridays - Are They Really That Great?
At the end of a long, hard, not to mention exhausting, week at work, it's good to reach Friday, knowing that a weekend full of relaxation with our family is waiting for us at home. One man, however, doesn't see things quite like that. Myke Wood…A man who had been experiencing severe financial difficulties before he eventually returned to work six weeks ago, has continued to exercise the spending constraints he imposed during the lockdown, claiming it is good practice for the future. Moys…
The 2020 US Masters is over even before Tiger (as the 2019 champion) could even launch his opening drive to inaugurate the tournament. And yet we have a winner! Taking time off from threatening the Supreme Court to Stop Counting the illegal votes…
Pelosi and Newsom apologize for lack of decency in following their own rules
Speaker of the House Pelosi and California's Governor Newsom have again been caught at the threshold of an embarrassing moment. First it was Ms. Pelosi holding a dinner for incoming Democratic house members, with special air conditioning units and…Banana Republic in South America sues the US for nicking their system!
(NOT EDITED) A tiny nation in South America, run by banana cartels, has gone to the International Court of Justice in The Hague, demanding the US pay them five billion $ Bucks, or they will sue both candidates for plagiarism! Banana Republics in A…WASHINGTON, D.C. â€" (Satire News) â€" According to the Washington Globe Express, President Trump told the director of the Walter Reed Hospital that he wanted all of his doctors and nurses to be Republicans. He made it clear that he did not want any…
Armenia And Azerbaijan Settle Their Differences
There was good news from Europe tonight, after it was announced that two countries that have been disputing the 'ownership' of land for 32 years, Armenia and Azerbaijan, have, at last, managed to resolve their differences and put an end to the confli…Trump claims Biden is half-Ugandan
In an astonishing statement from the White House, Donald Trump has claimed Joe Biden is ineligible to become President because he is half-Ugandan. "I have reliable information, 100 % true, that he was not born in Scranton Pennsylvania, but in Kampala…