Beware Of A Donald Trump Vaccine
Beware of a Trump vaccine. You might end up with an extra ear or gain two hundred pounds. And who wants to wear a fat red tie to cover your belly for the rest of your life? Now, about the extra ear. Well, one can easily invest in earmuffs, which w…Paul The Octopus Predicts Trump Win
According to every poll that is worth its salt, a victory for President Trump in the upcoming November election is about as unlikely as a beak on a bison, but experts may have to think again, as the renowned predictor of unlikely things, Paul the Oct…Man Says He'll Swing For The Next Person Who Tells Him To Buy A Kindle
A man who is an enthusiastic reader of books, but who struggles with modern-day technological advancements, says he is sick and tired of being told to purchase a Kindle, and will respond to the next person who advises him thus by smashing their teeth…Rock Star too Cool to Wear a Mask
Mancunian rock legend Eamonn Docherty has revealed the reasons that he refuses to wear a face mask during the current Coronavirus pandemic. Docherty, who rose to fame in the 1990s with his band Watering Hole, has upset many by claiming that he is…Teacher still as bad as his pupils remember him being
Although he does it professionally, in exchange for money, teacher Ray Irving is still the poor teacher that all of his pupils remember. The 47-year-old Chemistry teacher, who has worse science qualifications than most of his pupils, and is only w…Right Wing Comedian shouting that he is still here
David 'Jellybean' James, a right-wing comedian from the 1970s, that your parents probably won't remember either, has pointed out, to anyone that will listen, that he is still alive. 'All the woke kids, they don't want a dose of the truth, but I am…World's Largest Turnip To Enter Eurovision Song Contest…
A giant turnip that has grown to over 4 feet in diameter, has shocked its owner, Craig Niven, not because of its size, but because of its amazing singing qualities. Farmer Craig told of the moment that he went to dig-up the massive veg so he could…Microbes on Venus claim 'No Intelligent Life on Earth'
After the recent announcement that chemicals in the atmosphere of Venus might signify the presence of life, we at The Spoof managed to launch a space mission to the planet, in order to interview our new alien neighbors. We didn't base this on an old…Headlines Read: Donald Trump Is Full Of Prunes
Why on earth would Donald Trump be identified as being full of prunes? Today's polls indicate that people surveyed no longer believe anything Donald Trump says, after he called members of the US military losers and suckers. Even red-state tax-pay…Trump’s Secret Telephone Call To Barack Obama For Help
Stop the presses! Donald Trump made a desperate phone call to Barack Obama, asking for help. Nothing was going Trump’s way, particularly the Mexican wall. The wall wasn’t finished, and though he promised it would, Mexico hadn't paid a nickel for it.Taylor Swift’s Duet With Keith Urban Quickly Goes To Number 1
NASHVILLE â€" (Music Satire) â€" The singer who has the Midas Touch told Yippie-Ki-Yay magazine that she has set a new goal for herself â€" and that is to write at least one song per day. The artist, who Dolly Parton has described as the musical version…Shop Staff Given New Powers Over Gay Customers…
As of Monday, shop staff have been given the power to stop gay men and gay women from buying items for partners. It comes after the news that one gay man in his late 20s bought a shirt for his 52-year-old partner's birthday. "The item was chan…Man To Make His Own Face Mask Out Of Baby Diaper
With the Coronavirus showing no signs of wanting to go away, one man has decided that it's finally time to start taking things a bit more seriously, and start wearing a face mask. Never one to do things by halves, however, he plans to make his own…Spoof Site Owner To Try New Idea With Top Writers Chart
The owner of a forward-thinking satirical news website is toying with the idea of making a major change to the site's ranking system, which places writers in a chart showing who the most-read contributors are. He's thinking of turning it upside-do…Easy Listening Music Enthusiasts In Call For Equality
We're constantly told that we should not judge people or discriminate against them because of their color, sex, gender orientation, religion, or political stance, and now comes the latest warning - to stop judging people because of the music they lis…President Putin Tells President Trump Not to Worry â€" The Election is in the Bag
MOSCOW â€" (Satire News) - A very reliable source within the White House has stated that Russian President Vladimir Putin has informed President Trump not to worry about the upcoming election. The source said Putin assured the Trumpster that victory…Kim Kardashian Says She Has Agreed To Pose Nude in Playboy Magazine
HOLLYWOOD â€" (Satire News) â€" TMZ is reporting that Kim Kardashian will be appearing totally naked in an upcoming issue of Playboy. Kim stated that she is doing it to get back at her husband, Kanye "The Pest" West. She said that she has told him…Peter Strzok: Patsy or Patriot? Patsy.
Former FBI agent Peter Strzok said on Wednesday’s broadcast of MSNBC’s “Liveâ€, that history would see him and all the government agents that worked on the counterintelligence investigation into possible links between the Russian government and Trump…Trump Confesses He Can’t Win 2020 Election
Donald Trump has confessed that he can not win the 2020 election. At least, not honestly. So he condemned mail-in or absentee ballots, which are safe ways to avoid being exposed to the coronavirus. However, both leave a paper trail. Trump doesn't lik…Joe Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down) Biden
BILLINGSGATE POST: Kamala “Breath†Harris, Joe Biden's running mate in the 2020 election, raised eyebrows on Monday evening after she accidentally touted economic plans under a "Harris administration." "A Harris administration, together with Joe B…UK crawls up US rear end and vanishes!
(NOT EDITED) A tiny island in the middle of nowhere has decided to beg its big brother, over there, somewhere, to suck it up, and make sure it disappears into the Atlantic Ocean determined to become a Stars and Stripes satellite state. Political m…Lionel Messi Says He Plans to Run For President of Argentina When He Leaves Barcelona
BARCELONA â€" (Sports Satire) - Noticias Hispanicas is reporting that Barcelona footballer Lionel Messi, has commented that his next goal is to become the president of his motherland, Argentina. The superstar, stated that he misses the Argentinian P…NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell Makes a Big Announcement Regarding The Black Lives Matter Movement
NEW YORK CITY â€" (Sports Satire) - NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell spoke with members of the sports media on the ongoing controversy regarding the kneeling issue. The commissioner wanted to point out that he has ruled that those players who want to…Pele Says Two of His Star Soccer Players Have Tested Positive For Performance-Enhancing Drugs
SAO PAULO, Brazil â€" (Sports Satire) â€" Amazon News is reporting that the president of the Sao Paulo Red Grasshoppers, Pele, is very disappointed in two of his star players. Sao Paulo striker Galixico Saludos and goalkeeper Allegro Cabeza de Vaca ha…Tampa Bay Buccaneers Quarterback Tom Brady Has Laid A Bet That His Team Will Get To The Super Bowl
Tampa Bay, Fl - In a remarkable show of confidence in the ability and determination of his new football team, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback, Tom Brady, has bravely 'put his money where his mouth is', and placed a bet on the Buccs to reach Supe…Trump Announces Peace Accord With Seychelles and Mauritius
The White House, Washington D. C. Woof Blister with another SINful report for Spoof International News. Exclusive to The Spoof. President Donald J. Trump today, on the White House lawn, proudly announced a peace accord between two countries in Sout…Bob Woodward Has Painted His Fence
After the recent controversy surrounding the release of 'Rage', his book about President Donald Trump, Bob Woodward, the investigative journalist and best-selling author, has been taking a more leisurely approach to things, and last week, painted his…Lying Dog-Faced Pony Soldier Rode Side-Saddle
BILLINGSGATE POST: Inexplicably, when Joe Biden called a woman a “lying, dog-faced pony soldier†at a campaign stop in New Hampshire in February, he may have not known the origin of this line. Biden’s spokesman said the line comes from a John Wayn…Woodward Discovers Missing Minutes on Trump Tapes
Arlington, Va - Reporter Bob Woodward announced, yesterday, that over eighteen minutes from his Trump White House tapes were erased. "I don't know what happened," tweeted Woodward. "I remember the conversation like it was yesterday. In fact, it w…Trump’s Coronavirus Vaccine Is Coming, Uh Huh, Like His Tax Returns
As a win-win tactic to cover up his failure at warning Americans back in January about the coronavirus, Donald Trump today announced that a vaccine would be ready as soon as election day, November 3, 2020. Maybe even sooner. Voters are supposed to…